I have been struggling with acceptance all my life -throughout my childhood, my highschool, post high school and even in my current adulthood. This has seen me go to places and be in situations I wouldn't wish for anyone -but it is my life. I've been reflecting on my life in a bid to try and figure things out -and the more i pried, the more i didn't like what I found out; this drove me into a serious depression and anguish. When I examined my life now and envisioned what it could be - i got more anxious and irate.
I'm angry with myself, my family, my friends and my God; I'm asking you to pray for me to find peace in the knowledge that I am who I am and the only person with the power to change that is God through me. Help me find my faith in prayer, in God and in His will. Help me have the courage to renounce the negative forces that seem to have a hold on me -in form of my own worldy desires, opinionated mindset, influence from those around me. I need help finding the innocence within me - if there is any left, the faith I'm losing -for I think I'm tellin him I'm on the throne -He should retire; I'm thinking, He ain't enough - I want more, He ain't Just and He ain't Lord.
I'm soo confused right now, I really need help.