Julia.... read John 15, sit and meditate on that scripture. Then talk to God when you think you've gotten His message from it. And if because of all the chaos around you, you are unable to hear His message through this passage, literally just stop and pause and sit in silence for a bit, then talk to God and pour it all out to Him.
I Pray that You see God's hands throughout this journey.... for when you place your Trust in Him even with the tiniest of Faith, He still hears you. Look for little things to be grateful for throughout the day, like just being able to move, even if its with the aid of a walker... some people are bed-ridden. All of your children are alive and you have access to your daughter through your grandchild... that is an olive branch by God. Work on how you see life and as bad as things may seem with the right outlook on things, you can transform your life. One step at a time, one small action at a time and you can change your world.
God's hands are still on your life... you just need to change how you are looking at them. It's a battle to stay positive... but its a battle you can't afford not to fight.
My prayers are with you...
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Father, I come in agreement with your child, my sibling and everyone else that is praying for them that you would hear us and grant favor to your children... In Jesus Name...