I got conflicting messages today. One on this site saying dont seek dont ask dont knock just relax. But then my meditation on a different devotion app was luke 11:9 ask seek knock. Suggesting I should ask seek knock. Maybe God is saying I have already asked so relax. But then I'm taking it as dont ask for anything. Its all confusing. And I really need help relaxing. I am super uptight and tense and anxious all the time. Always trying to escape the present to get to the future gifts and blessings but he has given me so much now and these tjings aren't making me content. I am still hungry for the next thing. I only know what i think will satisfy me. Lord my prayer is that I walk in completeness free of anxiety and people pleasing. That your spirit is enough to satisfy me. I am tired of being ungrateful and lustful and envious and unsatisfied and depressed and prideful and boastful and jealous and feing drained of energy. My strength is not enough to find fulfillment. I am poor in spirit and I pray this isn't my normal. There has to be better state of being. There has too. This feels endless.

Lord please lift me up today. I am in the dumps pretty bad. I don't know what to ask for. Clarity. And help. Peace. Lack of frustration. It hurts. Thank you. Amen.

I got distracted for awhile. Distracted by the gifts the blessings. I turned my love to the blessing and away from the one who blesses. I used my blessing to seek the praise of the created. Lord i pray you exalt yourself in my heart and do not let me put anything in your place. I tried to force the hand of the creator and manipulate to my will. Forgive me lord.

Matthew 6:33 – But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you. ...

Please Lord help me to meditate and guide me to the right scriptures to meditate on please. Thank you Father amen.