Not sure what is going on with me as of late. I feel better about self this week, I feel different. I cant really explain, but I feel GOD working within me. This week on Friday night I was so very excited to get off work( I work nights) so that I could go to church, I thought that Saturday was actually Sunday. I have been talking to GOD in my quiet down times multiple times through out my nights at work as well as when I am at home , when I pray I thank HIM for the struggles and the lessons taught. I am at peace with so many things that in the past I would be obsessing on. I am tranquil as of late and I rather enjoy the feelings.

I am being held by YOU OH LORD and I feel YOUR LOVE radiating out of me, I feel myself instead of being the impulsive person I was just a few short weeks ago I feel myself within a very brief pause making choices based on YOUR WILL for me instead of living out, and lashing out with out thinking of how I am not living the way YOU would want me to be living, I am not saying that I am doing EVERYTHING in YOUR WILL but I see the changes within myself. I love myself more today than I can ever remember falsely loving myself in the past.

LORD I thank YOU for the day. Everyday I walk in YOUR GRACE is a blessing that YOU have pour out in my life. I thank you for the people both past, present and future that YOU have given me - blessing me. I ask that YOU continue to bring people into my life that help me draw nearer to YOU.

LORD, YOU know my heart and YOU know my thoughts even without a sound slipping from my lips. Even though I have gone through it before I have to say here that I am fearful of the procedure I am having this week , and I am fearful of Marc's surgery that he is setting up tomorrow as well as I know he is too. Please LORD, work within the both of us that YOU might calm these fears and keep our eyes on YOU. Help the both of us to complete what is broken in ourselves and one another. Draw us into YOU LORD. Use us as YOU see fit, to be the conduit of YOUR LOVE.

AMEN