My Dearest Deilia, Jesus loves you sooo much!!!!
He has taken away ALL your sins! You are totally forgiven. Now you must forgive yourself. Do not hold unforgiveness in your heart when Almighty God has forgiven you. when those hateful thoughts pop up, you tell them I am forgiven by God and I forgive myself. I Pray this helps you overcome this self loathing. I believe this will help rid your depression. And when you are in line at the grocery store and all lines are moving but yours. This is God teaching you to wait and be patient and to not be anxious. I had to learn this myself. I would tell myself ok God I can wait. It applies in traffic too.

Maybe CBD oil will help. It definitely won’t hurt. You can also get it in gummies. The agricultural CBD has no THC so you are not druging her and there are no side effects.

God wants you in His life too! Prayed